How Marriage Counselling in India Can Reinforce Unequal Gender Roles?

Uneven treatment or perceptions of people based on their gender is a phenomenon of gender inequality. It stems from the gender roles that have been socially created. Cultural stereotypes may be a contributing factor to gender inequality and income disparities. Generally, men have been considered workers; hence, jobs held by men have historically been and continue to be economically valued. Women have long been considered nurturing and compassionate and have been assigned jobs that need these qualities. While these abilities are culturally valuable, they are linked to domesticity and are not economically valued.

In a traditional India, marriages were such institutions that rigidly upheld the patriarchal structures in society. It followed that most, if not all, of the domestic work would be delegated to the females in the house, and they would serve the males in the house as per their needs, because earning for the family was a sufficient contribution on the part of the males of the house. Over the decades, women have stood up for their right to earn and be independent. Nevertheless, society still holds women responsible for their lack of involvement in household caretaking. So, women have taken up not only earning for themselves but also managing the house. And society rewards women who are bound to this work-life balance.

However, in recent years, as people have become more aware, they have started questioning this traditional notion of women being delegated way more responsibility than men in a marriage or in a relationship. And as this awareness has come to light, so has the need for equal gender roles within a marriage. While some might find it easy to do so by themselves, others may need professional intervention to guide them through on how to integrate gender equality effectively into a relationship. They approach marriage and relationship counsellors to assist them with the same. One such marriage and relationship counsellor in Delhi is Dr. Rashi Ahuja, founder of Happitude Studio, a counselling clinic based in Delhi. They provide counselling services in both online and offline modes. Dr. Rashi Ahuja, who is one of the best marriage counsellors in Delhi, has helped many couples deal soundly with their personal and marital issues.

Occasionally, marriage counselling is widely speculated to reinforce unequal gender roles. There have been instances where women approach marriage counsellors in Delhi to help them constructively communicate their need for equal delegation of work within a marriage to their partners. But instead, the counsellor has implied that they engage in activities that please their partners instead of starting a conflict and letting their husbands be at peace. While this practice is agreeably unacceptable within marriage and relationship counsellors, let’s try and explore why such a phenomenon has seeped from the outside society into the counsellor’s office:

• Men expressing vulnerability are generally looked down upon in society. They are encouraged to mask their emotions by showing masculine characteristics like strength, courage, independence, and assertiveness. As a result, more often than not, it is women who seek therapy, unfortunately becoming prey to rectification in the form of therapeutic intervention. They are encouraged to conform to traditional patriarchal notions, robbing them of the possibility of an equal marriage.
• In our society, an empowered woman is often portrayed as a threat to the family’s stability. She is placed under a bad light because sharing personal issues occurring within the family with an outsider, even if it is a professional like a relationship counsellor or a marriage counsellor, is treated as a violation of the family’s privacy. Further, an educated woman might encourage her husband to seek counselling as well to help solve any issues. But that is seen as a threat to the man becoming vulnerable.
• Though counsellors might be aware of prominent social structures like patriarchy and their impact on society, they fail to consciously avoid their influence in practice while in a counselling situation. Some might not even be aware that they are engaging in behaviours that reinforce unequal gender norms with their clients.

If you are also struggling with gender inequalities, try talking to your partner about it. Communicating with your partner about how gender inequality makes you uncomfortable can make them understand your feelings and reduce the conflicts. If you find it difficult to help them understand your point, feel free to reach out to Dr. Rashi Ahuja, a relationship counsellor in Delhi, as she is well-trained and can help you to find a common ground. Next, you and your partner may divide the various responsibilities, like household chores, financial responsibility, etc., based on the comfort and ability of both partners, rather than what society tells you to. When couples prioritize equality in their marriage, they treat each other as equals and with respect, consider each other’s needs, and support one another. Thus, form common goals with your partner and work together to attain them.

However, if you can’t break down the usual walls and mutually arrive at a solution, you can always seek counselling. Marriage counsellors are trained professionals who focus on the concerns of their clients with the goal of resolving marital issues. They seek to identify the roots of the problem and develop skills that will help to strengthen the marriage. If you are looking for a relationship counsellor or a marriage counsellor in Delhi, you can approach Dr. Rashi Ahuja. She has provided guidance to many couples on how to productively mandate equal gender roles in a relationship. You don’t have to be in a bad relationship to get help. Couples who just wish to improve their relationships and develop a deeper understanding of each other can also benefit from marriage therapy. Relationship counsellors in Delhi can help them learn to cope with problems more effectively and avoid minor issues escalating into major ones.

Often, people prefer to turn to close friends or family members when it comes to discussing their personal and marital issues. This choice may not be effective in the case of biased advice. Trusting the best relationship counsellor and marriage counsellor in Delhi with your marital issues takes a lot of courage, and it is indeed a step taken in the right direction. Dr. Rashi Ahuja, one of the best relationship counsellors in Delhi, promises to provide a safe, unbiased, and non-judgmental environment to assist you in achieving your counselling goals.